Real Housewives of Orange County “Making Woo-Hoo-Py” RECAP!

Hey everyone! It’s OC Monday! Last week we were introduced to email gate. Then transitioned into Tamra’s a sucky friend/has a robot baby gate. And finally Lizzie became president of the kiss ass club and we saw Brooks’ ass… ew! Also, Heather’s a bitch, but we already knew that; so let’s jump right in!

This week’s episode opens with Shannon and her daughters getting their plates ready for a dinner at home when David gets home from work. David asks Shannon is she’s ready for their Mexico vaca as he gives her a loving kiss hello. After dinner, the Beadors start packing for their trip to Puerto Vallarta to meet Vicki and Brooks. Of course Shannon is being a pain in the ass to David as they pack, but honestly I think that David’s trying very hard to be civil and set a positive vibe for their couple’s trip.

Now we’re at the Dubrows and ugh…

Oh goody, now the personal chef is here and so is Heather’s assistant. Isn’t she an at home mom? Wait, Terry’s not even having dinner with the family tonight and Heather has a personal chef preparing dinner? It would so be a pizza night if my hubs weren’t at home. Don’t judge me, LOL! Whatever, kids love pizza. At least Heather admits that she sucks at cooking. Nothing’s worse than a bitch that can’t cook and doesn’t know it.

Ok, now we’re in Mexico and Vicki’s personal chef speaks only Spanish, hallelujah! Having a chef while on vacation is totally fine because who wants to do stuff like cook while they’re away? Vicki says that she invited Shannon and David because their marriage is in trouble and maybe it would be nice for them to be around a healthy couple, like her and Brooks. LOL of the century, right? Vicki’s so excited that she’s at her condo in Mexico.

 Shannon’s bummed because they have a small room with a double bed. They’re contemplating getting a hotel room; so they will have more space. Apparently when the Beadors vaca; they go all out and Vicki’s condo ain’t all out. Can Vicki stop squeaking the bed? Gross, that’s a vision that I can do without! Vicki tells David and Shannon that if they don’t like their bedroom then they can just sleep on the couch with her son Michael. Yes, Michael’s there too and so is Vicki’s brother. That’s so weird! Why are they at the couple’s trip?

Tamra and her stupid robot baby are complaining about how she’s too old for a baby and Eddie agrees as he duces the hell outta there for another one of his multi hour bike rides.

We’re back in Grossexico… population Brooks. WTF is going on , BTW? Don’t answer that… Hey, at least Vicki’s brother, Billy gave his room up to the Beadors. Apparently it was the bigger room; so all is shaping up, maybe?

Lizzie and her kids are being fussy, again. She’s complaining about her husband’s daddy skills or lack there of… Look Lizzie, I was at a friend’s pool party last weekend and I heard this same crap from one of them. I’ll listen to it from my friends, but not some new cast member, filler in the face lady. Ok? I can’t stand chicks that complain about mom stuff. Like we don’t all deal with the day to day of it. Is all I’m saying!

Now we’re jet skiing in Mexico. I hope that things get better. Nope, Shannon’s still complaining … seriously, she doesn’t even know how to woo hoo properly. THAT’S a problem, LOL! At least Brooks is consistent with his grossness. Is Vicki really dating that tool? I can’t…

Oh wow, David’s struggling to try and find something that Shannon’s fun at; as the couples swap stories. He still has nothing. We’ll come back to him. I’m sure he’ll think of something. Like hey, Shannon can feng shui like no one’s business, LOL! There’s one right there or how about how she’s good at spending their money on stupid stuff like crystals in her teeth? See, this is easy!

They’re all having fun shooting back some tequilas. Well, Shannon isn’t. Seriously? I would no longer be wearing pants if I drank that much tequila. That’s just how normal people react!

Vicki is taking Shannon shopping; so maybe a little retail therapy will turn Shannon’s bitch upside down.

Lizzie and Heather are meeting for.. oh who cares?

Eddie and Tamra and taking Astro, their robot baby out of the house. Tamra’s embarrassed of the robot; I mean baby. Not sure why she’s been up Eddie’s ass about treating it like a real baby, but not my biz. Holy buckets of balls! I’m right there with you, Vicki! Holy Buckets of Balls is what this episode should’ve been named, IMO.

Shannon’s pretty, but fuck! Why is she bringing up the divorce email, again? I wouldn’t have even shared that with my priest or wrote it in my journal for that matter. As if!

At least Vicki agrees with Shannon. I’ve never been kicked out of anyone’s house either though. WTF, Heather Dubrow? I’m done blogging on Heather and her chef-isodes, honestly. No thanks! I like Terry. I think his show with Dr. Paul Nassif, ‘Botched’ is great and they are an awesome team, but damn! I can’t with Heather and her Hawaii Five-O bullshit. Has anyone even seen her on that show? OMG, did she really just taunt her kid for not being able to read? See, that’s why I don’t like her!

We’re back in Mexico. Shannon’s all, “I don’t want to start an argument, but…” then launches right into David with the, “I hate it when you…” type of talk. I really don’t blame this guy for anything because she’s awful to him. He should just run off and do tequila shots with a mail order robot baby and be done with it already. I would!

Sooo Shannon has made things even more awkward than we thought was possible while everyone was having a nice time at dinner. I mean honestly, nothing is ever awkward in Mexico, right?

Oh wait…

Screen Shot 2013-06-11 at 3.23.42 PM

Next week on the Real Housewives of Orange County…

Shannon dances awkwardly on the bar at Andales. Ryan plays with his robot baby brother and Brooks hates Tamra. Stay tuned!

 

photo source: bravotv, btvguide, rhocfacebook, quickmeme, funnyonlinepictures

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