Real Housewives of New Jersey “A Hairy Situation” RECAP!

Hey guys! It’s going to be a doozy of an episode tonight, but first let’s re-hash what happened last week. Amber told Melissa that when Nicole and Bobby started dating he was still married with kids. Teresa did her dessert line tasting party and Melissa found out about Joey’s new venture in the garbage business.

This week Melissa opens the episode with her and Joe at the dealership because Melissa wrecked her Bentley that she has on loan. While they’re waiting on the estimate for their car repair Melissa asks Joey how he liked hanging out with Rino, Bobby and Jim. He says he loves all the guys except for Jim. Joey says that Jim is a pencil dick and he wants to give him a wedgie for talking crap about the Giudices. It’s going to cost over $7,000 to fix Melissa’s car. Note to self: Do not buy a Bentley! Did Dina just say, “Oh jeah!” Easy Jersey… Dina and her assistant, Luke are in her closet trying to decide which shoes to donate. Dina’s Luke has nothing on the Luke from Ladies of London; so moving on… Oh great, now I miss Ladies of London! I hope they come back for a second season.

Melissa, the twins and Teresa are shopping for costumes for Bobby’s First Responders party. How random, right? They fill Teresa in on what Amber said about Nicole wrecking a family. Teresa wants to know if Amber will be at the party. The twins invited Amber before she decided to talk mess about Nicole; so she’s going. There should be some drama at this party!

LOL, Milania just told Audriana to be sure to keep her money in her bra. I can’t!😀 Teresa is serving her girls some ice cream and they’re very excited. They keep screaming out to Teresa what toppings they want on their ice cream and driving her crazy. Teresa says that she no longer has her hot Italian temper. She says it’s better to give people no reaction. Um, duh! Teresa shows her daughters the portrait they took at Joe’s grandmother’s birthday party. Then she starts crying. Her girls want her to stop crying. Teresa tells them that she’s crying because making memories makes her happy. She also tells her daughters to always stick together as sisters. Awe…

Jim is having his family star in a commercial for his mortgage company. He drives me nuts and he’s dorky, but at least he has a steady job. Their kids are super cute doing this commercial. You can tell they’ve done it before because they totally have the system down. It’s adorable. Dina is having Nicole over. She’s making fun of Dina’s weird cats. Now they’re talking men and Nicole tells Dina that she wants to set her up with one of her friends. Dina tells her that she won’t be ready to date until next month because of Venus.. I don’t know; who really cares? Dina is trying to figure out what her costume will be for the first responders party.

Teresa and Joe pick up Joey and Melissa for the costume party. Teresa is a sexy nurse. Melissa is a sexy SWAT girl. Joey is a fire fighter and Joe is too cool for a costume so he’s wearing a suit. Joe’s packing an attitude in the limo on the way to the party. He knows that Jim is going to be there. He’s none too pleased that Jim doesn’t want to associate with him or Teresa. Joey says that it’s crappy of Jim because you don’t kick a man when he’s down. Amber and Jim are getting ready for the party. I think Amber’s supposed to be a sexy cop? Jim wanted to go as an ambulance chaser, but ends up dressing up as a cop as well. Ok, so that Matt guy that Nicole wants to set up with Dina is hot! She would be insane not to go out with him. Dina and Matt are introduced and it gets very awkward all the sudden. Dina is not smooth at all and now I’m just feeling sorry for her. She ends up suggesting a group date when Matt asks her out. I didn’t think that Dina could get anymore lame than she already is, but I was so very wrong. She’s an off the charts lame ball right now.

Rosie gets to the party and tells everyone that her costume is a sniper. It becomes evident that Rosie has no idea what a sniper is as she explains that if a bad guy comes; she’s going to jump off the roof and break his neck. Oh boy…

Kathy’s there too, but no one cares.

It’s always a better idea if Joey doesn’t talk, BTW. I’ll just leave it at that because he’s such an idiot. Teresa and Melissa tell Dina that she needs to start dating and I agree. She’s so Zzzzzzz! I can’t believe cute guy Matt even wants to go out with her! Jim’s a douche; plain and simple. Now Rosie’s talking to him and I’m hoping she goes all sniper on his ass. Teresssssa tells Amber that she has an issue with her. When Amber asks her to elaborate on why she’s so upset Teressssssa rolls her eyes and walks off. Then Amber tells Nicole, “Look, this is my best friend’s house and it’s not my fault that he won’t marry you!” Thems some fightin’ words right there! Then the hair pulling and drink throwing begins.

Now that the dust has settled Amber is upset because she and Nicole are good friends and they just had a knock down, drag out. I’d be more embarrassed that I got into a fight at their age over some bs that’s none of her business, but that’s just me.

Ok, so now I love Rino! He has some balls rushing in to put Jim in his place. Someone had to and Rino shut him down. For a little while anyway…

Joe GorgaJoey could care less, really about what Jim said about the Giudices. All he’s pissed about is that Jim called him a jerk off. They get into it. Then Joe goes after Jim. Jim says that he can have Joe arrested in no time; which gets Teresa out of her seat. My take away from this episode is that Jim’s the one that’s a jerk off. He and Amber shouldn’t have come to Bobby’s party, IMO. Also, this whole fight is all Melissa’s fault. If she hadn’t told the twins what Amber said about Nicole breaking up a family then Bobby’s party wouldn’t have gone in the shitter.

photo credit: hulu, rashmanly, bravotv, thewrap, usmagazine, gettyimages, tumblr, knowyourmeme

4 thoughts on “Real Housewives of New Jersey “A Hairy Situation” RECAP!

  1. Gurrllls, y’all are hilarious! I’m dying with your gifs, hahaha! Best site. Thank goodness for a site that is actually funny. No one needs some total lunatic that attacks readers that try to be nice and give her a few pity comments and lie their asses off that she’s funny…when she’s NOT!

    Love, love, love all of you!

    Like

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